There He Goes... Again!

It's that time of the year again when the hottest talent in the world of kicking a ball comes around to see who's got the best negotiator. And this year hasn't failed to disappoint. There has been every sort of drama the transfer market would like to see and its still 2 days to closure, or as the fans call it rumour time for january.

So we say Samuel Eto'o join chelsea about 5 years after calling them crap. That should bear well for the blues. Flamini is back in arsenal shoes, which just leaves them with needing a keeper, a center back, 2 full-back, a central mdifield, an all english breakfast, some sushi, a pair of pyjamas, an aircraft and 3 pots of gold on the back of Megan Fox away from the title. They are always one bad performance away from "Wenger suxxx man!! #fail" statuses on facebook. Loyalty died in 2008. Then there is Gareth Bale, who has to be the ugliest squirm on the planet to have that much money thrown at him. All that for a left foot. Madrid's current offer is 100 million euros, Di maria, local women from Mallorca, 6 freshly hatched chickens and the Starship Enterprise (because we need to cater to trekkies too). Its hilarious that London has Bale advertising for Lucozade. Bale posters have the unique purpose of scaring drunks on a Tuesday night, who mistake it for a signal from the planet of the apes.

David Moyes has proved in the transfer market that he is the singular polite guy in Scotland. Anyone else from that frigid country (ah! pun) would just walk up to the Everton toffee house, give mints to Roberto Martinez and walk out with giant Baines-Fellaini shaped holes in the doors of Goodison Park (i think that's where Everton play). Madrid decided to buy funny sounding names. I mean Isco, really? the comedy practically writes itself, if you're from Punjab (read: birmingham).

So what will happen till the end of the market. Lets feature uneducated guesses because hey its free. Modric to United. Because his role at Real is to make sure the roofs  are fine. geremi might go to bursaspor (thats my attempt to sound well researched). and jose mourinho will blame birds for his troubles. Something like that. Wait for our in-depth coverage of transfer deadline day frenzies.